I used to feel misunderstood. Maybe that’s why I became a writer. I needed to explain myself. Once texts became popular, people thought I was being terse. Okay. I am known for being blunt, but I have learned how to gently be candid. Instead of agreeing with a friend who says, “My haircut sucks,” I’ve learned to say, “You sound disappointed. You could have purple hair and be gorgeous.” If said friend groaned that might mean she was looking for commiseration and then I might add, “Yes, it kinda sucks?”
Choose wisely.
I Was Never An Emoji Girl
…until one day my daughter responded to a text, “Ma, why are you being curt?”
Huh?
Misunderstood -- my old paranoia rang in my head.
I looked back at my text. I said something innocent like, “Did you call the doctor?”
I know. Questions can be loaded when it’s a mom to her spawn. In fairness to me, my kid could have responded, “I’m an adult. I got this.” Either way, I started viewing texts with a new eye. 👁️
Now, my text might read, “Sweetie, did you have a chance to call the doctor? 🥰 🙏🏻”
Better, right? My daughter would think so too. (Love you, Samantha. You’re my favorite paid subscriber. ❤️)
It was then that I became an Emoji girl. (And added “sweetie” for good measure.)
The Dawn of Emojis
What’s an Emoji essay without its history? Early Emojis were called Emoticons. Remember those? I still use them in an email. :) The first Emojis were created in 1999 by a Japanese artist. Here’s the article if you’re curious to learn more.
This video states that the first Emoji EVER dates back to the 17th Century “when a Slavic notary used one to indicate the satisfaction of his town’s financial records.” I would argue that Emojis were used before language. Just look at any cave drawing.
The Definitions of Emojis
Reader, if you’ve seen me on Notes or in your Comments, you might recognize my favorite Emojis. 🥰 🙏🏻 I’m getting tired of them too.
In my search for a new cartoon representative, I am stumped and left guessing. I don’t know what half of them mean and the explanations don’t help.
Tell me if you agree:
🥹 I just got out of the pool.
🥺 Is that a spider?
😏 Your haircut sucks… sweetie.
🥴 There’s something in my eye.
🤗 Jazz hands. (Bob Fosse approved.)
🧟 I’m sick but can still do jazz hands.
🙇🏼♂️ I can’t find my contact lens.
🤯 Someone’s roasting marshmallows on my head.
🧐 I travelled through time with my monocle.
😶🌫️ Just getting out of the shower.
🫥 I’m feeling lazy like this Emoji artist.
🤬 They forgot the rolls again in my dinner order.
🫨 You might need glasses.
🤏🏻 This is the finger position for chopsticks. And the size of something else.
😵💫 I got up too fast.
Here’s a one sided dialogue with a mob boss of few words:
“Don Capone, what happened to Rocco?”
“🪓🪚⚰️”
“Need anything?”
“🪣🧽”
“Be right over.”
“💰”
“And where’s that two-timer Giovanni?”
🐠
__________
I think I’ll stick with 🥰 🙏🏻.
When I posted this conundrum on Notes, here are some responses:
Thanks for playing,
1. Do you have a favorite Emoji definition all your own?
2. Do you Emoji?
3. Are you misunderstood?
This is hilarious. My daughter is great at telling short stories with emojis. One time I told her I had bad cramps, and she responded with something like: 😫🤕🚑😵 Made me laugh.
🎯💯.
When I 👩💻 or 📝, I use:
📣 so my words won’t disappear into digital ether,
🙄 or 🤥 so they won’t be taken too seriously,
👺 or 👊 so they will be, and
👣 if I was the one who ate the last slice of pie and left the sticky pan on the counter.
👚 Now, off to do some laundry.