Funny AF Woman #14

Renee Fountain

Sep 12, 2024

There’s a lot of truth to the studies on adversity in childhood forming adults who are funny. Humor is a coping mechanism; a way to laugh through the pain.

Renee reached out to me from the

Sarah Fay

cohort. (Sarah Fay not only has great webinars and classes for writers but is secretly a match.com for authors who should know each other.)

Here’s my reaction after reading Renee’s answers, “This is exactly what I want from this interview. The painful honesty, to me, makes a great interview. Its courageous. It’s also where great humor is born. Thank you for sharing.”

1. What were your life events that lead you to realize, “Hey, I’m pretty funny.”

I think it was when I was in 5^th grade. The teacher was about to assign us homework and for some reason I invoked the voice and accent of First Lady Roslyn Carter telling her all the reasons we shouldn’t have homework. This was especially odd to me because I’d spent fourth grade hiding behind my hair and my notebook in class.

In my 20s I gave an off-the-cuff speech at my girlfriend’s wedding that got a lot of laughs. I was very flattered when someone came up to me afterwards to ask if I was a professional comedian.

2. Did your parents encourage your funny side?

I don’t think they encouraged it so much as informed it. Most of the stuff my brother and I did that made us laugh, didn’t translate to my mother. She would often say, “You think you’re funny, but you’re not.” I disagreed.

There were a lot of discussion about my “attitude”.

My father was very sarcastic, which, under the right circumstances could be funny. He was also an alcoholic, so sometimes, not so funny. He used to wear a shirt that said, “My best friend ran off with my wife. I’m really going to miss him.”

When we were older my mother ended up having a great sense of humor – still does. I think she was just having buyers’ remorse having two kids who only stopped fighting when they slept, and a husband who could be reached by calling the local bar.

3. How did you nurture your funny side?

I read Erma Bombeck from my mother’s bookshelf when I was a kid. Even at a young age I could appreciate her humor and recognize good writing. I would also check out tons of joke books – Knock Knock jokes mostly, with which I’d torment my mother on a long car rides because she was a captive audience.

Knock Knock

Who’s there?

Chesterfield

Chesterfield Who

Chesterfield my leg, so I slapped him

That one still gets me.

I loved watching comedians doing stand up. During my teen years there were a ton of them on HBO and besides seeing the greats, I saw the people starting out, who would eventually become great. I have a rule though: if they don’t make me laugh in 5 minutes, I change the channel.

I also watched Benny Hill with my father, Kids in the Hall, SNL…

4. Do you think you may have inherited your funny bone? A funny uncle?

Not that I’m aware of. I think my family members are funny by mistake. For instance, later in his life my grandfather moved a few blocks away. My grandmother was in a facility dying of Alzheimer’s, so he lived alone. One day my brother, Bob, goes over to visit and notices my grandfather’s shoes are outside on the door mat.

Bob goes in, sees my grandfather watching TV, and says, “Grandpa, do you want me to bring your shoes inside?” My grandfather says, “Robert, don’t ever get old. One minute you’re watching TV and the next you’re pissing in your shoes.”

I think this perfectly sums up life.

My brother and I share a dark sense of humor. I can do light too, but I think it’s a product of growing up under tough conditions. There’s a lot of truth to the studies on adversity in childhood forming adults who are funny. Humor is a coping mechanism; a way to laugh through the pain.

I’m sure my father taking us to see the Exorcist when I was seven and my brother was 10, also has something to do with it. We had to make ourselves laugh later that night (and for weeks after) so we could go to sleep. It didn’t help that my father stood outside my bedroom in the dark hallway doing the voice of the demon talking to Father Damian, pretending to be his mother. Good parenting wasn’t his superpower.

5. Did being funny ever get in the way of a close relationship?

Not a romantic relationship so much as a close friendship; and it wasn’t my funny that ruined it. I had a friend when I was 17 who was working toward being a stand-up comedian, and he eventually made it. He went on the tonight show, did comedy clubs, the whole nine. We stayed friends into my 30s and I was big supporter. However, it became difficult to hang out with him because it was never him anymore – he was always “on”, always doing a bit. We couldn’t have normal conversations like we used to.

A million years ago I was on Match.com. I met an author. We were emailing back and forth for a while, and he asks me if I’m free that weekend. I told him I just had to catalog my human hair collection, but other than that I was available. He LOVED it… I was concerned. On the date he said he was a vegetarian, so I asked him if he thought baby carrots were the “veal” of the vegetable world. He asked me for a second date. I was too busy making him laugh to realize we had nothing in common.

6. If you’re in a partnership, is he or she funny? Was/Is humor a requirement?

More than being funny, being able to laugh is a requirement. I broke up with a guy because he actively tried NOT to laugh when I said something funny. It made me think, if he can’t even give me a laugh, what else will he withhold.

If you can make me laugh, then huge bonus points.

7. If you have a funny partner is there ever a joke competition or do you play well off each other?

There’s never a competition. I love it when my significant other can keep up with me. I have a few friends who are funny and we feed off each other in kind of a “Yes and” way. Often, we’re just exaggerating things, but we “get” each other’s humor and have a lot of fun.

8. Did being a jokester ever get in the way of school or work? How?

When I was working at S&S I would crack jokes or make funny comments in meetings. Despite the others laughing – I was eventually pulled aside and asked to cease all humorous activity. To me, funny is funny – and it was never at anyone’s expense-but maybe it gets annoying.

9. Was anyone ever threatened by your humor?

Nobody was threatened that I’m aware of. I once made my mother laugh when she was drinking lemonade and it came out her nose. It was very painful for her. I felt bad for that one.

10. Can you tell me about a time when you turned something painful into something humorous?

There are so many, but it’s tough to think of a good one. The only thing that comes to mind is I have four herniated discs in my back, and every once in a while, my back seizes. It’s excruciating. My doctor told me eventually the issue can worsen and I could lose control of bodily functions. I told him, the good news is I ride the subway a lot, so if it happens there, nobody will notice.

11. Can you tell me about a time when you couldn’t muster anything funny and how it affected you? How did you rebound from the unfunny funk?

I never felt less funny or had an urge to make a joke during the five days I sat by my father’s hospital bed waiting for him to pass. At this point he’d had mini-strokes and didn’t remember who I was. They had him hopped up on morphine to keep him comfortable and he slept most of the time. I just sat next to him holding his hand and telling him all the good memories I had of him. It was a rather short list, but longer than I thought it would be.

When he passed, I had this useless feeling of not knowing what to do with myself. I felt like I was supposed to be somewhere doing something, but couldn’t remember where or what. It took me a few days to regain my focus. I don’t remember how long it was before I started joking and laughing again.

12. Can you describe the type of humor you possess? Clever Wit, quick-with-a-joke, physical, goofball, aggressive, self-enhancing, self-deprecating, dark, observational, or one I didn’t think of? What’s an example of how you might respond using that humor in a given situation?

I think I check all those boxes except goofball and aggressive, and probably add sarcastic in there – I had no choice for that one, it was the only language my father spoke.

Often times I use my humor to relate things that made me angry, happened during my subway commute or a trip to the doctor. Depending on what I’m talking about it can often turn into a tight ten at the Laugh Factory. Often times retelling something that made me mad helps me get over it.

13. If you have kids, when was the first time you made them laugh?

These are my kids. They picked the outfits.

14. Did your kid inherit your comedy skill?

They definitely have, they make me laugh all the time.

15. Did your sense of humor change in the last 5 years?

No, it has stayed consistent. I just have more material now that I’m a woman of a certain age. There are a lot more humbling, embarrassing and WTF?! moments with which to entertain my friends and family.

16. Was your humor ever mean? What happened? Any regrets?

My humor was never intentionally mean. I think sometimes, when you have a quick wit, things just fly out of your mouth and it might not be the best time or place; or, it sounded funnier in your head. However, I never intend to hurt anyone, but it happens.

While I can’t think of something I did, I remember being with a friend. We met up with his mother, and a few of her friends. His mother was wearing a casual white cotton dress with gold sequined horizontal stripes. I remember thinking, “It’s Waldo’s mom” but my friend said, “Mom, why are you dressed like a $2 hooker”… there was an awkward silence… He berated himself the rest of the night, he felt horrible.

17. What would be the title of your life right now?

How Many Licks Does It Take To Get To the Center of My Sanity?

18. Who is your role model? If you could say anything to this person, what would it be?

I don’t know if I have a role model, but I greatly admire women writers like Tina Fey, Nora Ephron and Erma Bombeck. I’d say thank you.

Renee is a publishing veteran and former book scout for CW Television network. She is the President of Gandolfo Helin & Fountain Literary Management. The founder of Gryphon Quill developmental editing. You can get writing and publishing tips and info from her Gryphon Quill newsletter on Substack. If you’re feeling brave or nostalgic you can find her on Twitter-X and Linked-In. She coaches writers on her private site, as well as Manuscript Academy.